Faith Isn't Something You Lose
by PsychoKitten06
Summary: Edward Elric oneshot I wrote a while ago and it was for a friend of mine, xXxTaintedXAngelxXx on quizilla :D I hope you like it    I should be working on my other story right now...


_When the church doors opened wide,_

_She put her veil down,_

_Trying to hide her tears._

_Oh she just couldn't believe it!_

_She heard the trumpets from the military band,_

_And the flowers fell outta her hands…._

_Baby why did you have to leave me?_

_I was counting on forever,_

_Now I'll never know!_

_I can't even breathe._

_It's like I'm looking from a distance,_

_Standing in the background._

_Everybody's saying he isn't coming home!_

_This can't be happening to me,_

_This is just a dream…_

_**I did not ask you to help. I did not ask you to come all this way. I did not need the help, I would've been just fine! But you had to butt in, you had to be the idiot that you are, didn't you? **_

_**With tears in my eyes, and a heart that is soon to shatter into pieces, I pick you up and run as fast as my legs can carry me. **_

"_**Hold in there!" I scream over the thunder and lightning, memories flashing through my frantic mind. **_

_**I don't hear a single sound come from you, nothing. Not a word, nor sound. My heart beats against my ribcage and the nausea and despair wash over me. Just when and where did everything go so very wrong?**_

_**Tears roll down my cheeks, wishing I could turn back time.**_

I rolled my orbs at the short-tempered blondie in front of me, and casually made my way around him. "I don't have to tell you anything!" I laughed loudly, making a face. Edward Elric shot me a death glare, but not fazing me one bit. "Where have you been Alice Kyoko?" he shouted again, his fists swaying at each side of his small quivering body. My eyes soften some what when I realized how upset he actually was.

"B-big brother. Leave Kyoko-san alone.." Alphonse pleaded from inside his empty armor.

"Look shorty, I was just taking a long walk. No need to bust a vein, kay?" I sarcastically remarked with a playful grin.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT THAT-"

I jumped playfully in front of him and flicked him in the forehead, what a hot-head. Jesh, I couldn't help but love the guy though. If you hadn't noticed, we were having a 'fight'. Over what you may wonder? Well, all I do is take a long walk out of town, stay in some hotel for three days and come back a few days later only to be greeted by a; "WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?" Pleasant really. What was so wrong about wanting to be alone? To have time to think by myself? Honestly, it wasn't as if I died or anything, Edward should know me by now.

Edward stared hard at me, his golden orbs looking a bit glossy, as if holding back tears.

I felt a pang of hurt attack my heart.

"Look, I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to worry you. I just went off on a walk for a few days…. To think." I apologized with a soft gentle smile, I would have never guessed that something so small would've worried him so much. "It's not like I can't protect myself." I added with a roll of my eyes and another playful smile. I ruffled his hair and casually sat down under a shady tree. A looked up to observe Ed's expression, but I couldn't quite read it. He had his poker face on, and it annoyed me. It annoyed me when I wasn't sure what was going on, I didn't like it when my friends held back secrets, I wasn't nosy. I just feel like I should know when they're upset, so I can at least help out.

"You could've gotten hurt." he finally growled under his breath, not looking me in the eye. "I know, but I didn't, did I?" I smirked. "You can't leave without letting us know." Ed continued, glaring at me a bit. I scoffed. "I can protect myself Ed, don't worry."

"How can't I worry, knowing there's a deranged demented maniac out there looking for you?"

I winced, knowing he was completely correct.

You see, my parents were very strong and intelligent Alchemists, my father being the Iron Alchemist and my mother being the Lightning Alchemist, so it would be pretty obvious that their child would turn out a strong alchemist prodigy, though I didn't consider myself much of a 'prodigy', prodigies had everything come naturally to them, I worked hard for what I had. Any who, the point is, my father had an enemy, he was an ex State Alchemist. The 'Aero Alchemist' was the name he was known as. From what everyone in the military, or what we told, was that this crazy man, who had been in his 30's, had killed six innocent adults and four innocent children. His response when asked why had acted on those horrid actions? "I was bored." He has a horrid way killing, being able to control the air's current and slicing his enemies to tiny bits, I would know.

He murdered my father.

Do not misunderstand, I hold no real grudge against this man, though it saddens me to know he killed my father, and my mother. For some wicked reason, this man holds a grudge against me. Can you believe it? Should it not be the other way around? Oh well, he has been looking for me, and so far the military has had me under lock down for about a month now, never letting me out of sight. Of course I always end up wondering off on my own, so this is why Ed and Al have been so worried, but I find it somewhat silly.

If I die, it will because it is what God wants, is it not? If He doesn't want me to die, then He'll protect me. Either way, what happens is all out of God's will. Not ours. So no matter what we do, what happens, happens.

Perhaps I was already ready for death, I wasn't afraid and would not cower under Aero's power, if he wanted to fight me, then he would get a fight of a lifetime.

"Why do you think this man wants to harm you?" Al asked, I could hear the stress in his voice and I mentally kicked myself. I would've never imagined how upset they would get over this situation.

"A grudge against my father, and I'm his daughter. It's demented logic, Al." I answered with a small sigh and threw myself onto the ground to stare up at the clouds hovering ahead.

"But… You didn't do anything wrong." Al insisted, he just didn't understand. Well, I didn't understand completely either, but who would? Only someone as twisted and sadistic as Envy would understand. The thought of the tall greenette caused a smile to make it's way to my lips.

I had seen him during my long walk.

**[Flashback]**

"**Does Fullmetal know your walking around on your own?" Envy smirked as he kept pace with me. I sighed deeply, snuggling deeper into my cloak. "Nope." I answered, "I didn't know he was my mom now." I added sarcastically. The shape-shifter just rolled his purple orbs.**

"**You know full well you shouldn't be off on your own." Envy growled, suddenly becoming serious.**

"**And why not?" I countered with a cocked eyebrow.**

"**If you get hurt-" he cut himself off and growled under his breath. My eyes widen in mock shock.**

"**Gee Envy, I didn't know how much I meant to you!" I gushed with a laugh. The tall male just glared in my direction.**

"**I don't care about you, filthy human!" he spat angrily. I rolled my eyes at his white lie.**

"**Well then, it shouldn't matter if I get murdered then." I grinned, walking off into an opposite direction. I felt a warm hand grab my pale one, drawing me closer. "If you get yourself killed, I swear I'll find a way to find you in Hell and I'll rip your limbs off." Envy growled into my ear. It was his way of saying; **

"**You're my friend, please don't get yourself killed. I care about you."**

**[End of Flashback]**

I sighed, friends nowadays.

"What did your father do to upset this bastard?" Ed asked harshly making himself comfy next to me.

"Um, I'm not sure." I mumbled, cuddling next to Ed and watching as he blushed deeply. At the moment I hadn't thought much of it, almost as if I had just brushed it off.

Edward was quiet the rest of the time, Alphonse had sat down nearby and chatted happily with me. But every so often I would glance over at my small friend, wondering what was wrong. I couldn't help but feel like something was terribly wrong.

"Are you okay Ed?" I finally blurted out, shooting Al an apologetic smile for interrupting him.

"No."

That one word sent shivers down my spine, a part of me wanting to scream out that he was a lying bastard, but another part of me just wanted to cry. Confused, I just nodded and went back to chatting with Alphonse, a bit less enthusiastic.

Something was terribly wrong. But I realized it a bit too late.

Later that day I found myself walking home, with Armstrong as my 'bodyguard' honestly I thought everyone was overreacting, if not just a bit. I usually would've found a way to chat happily with the large man, but today I felt as if a vampire had just sucked the life out of me. I felt drained and overall tired and mildly upset. I hadn't done anything to even give me an excuse to be 'tired', all I had spent doing my afternoon was lying under a shady tree at nearby park and conversed with Al and Ed(Sort of, he didn't feel like talking.) I just sighed softly and snuggled into my large coat, the Edward's expression never leaving my mind. He was upset, and seemed to have a crazy look in his eye.

Armstrong tried to start up a conversation, but it just got completely awkward and he had finally decided to just give up. I wanted to apologize for not trying, but I was afraid it would just get worse. So I just kept my mouth shut, sighing every few minutes. Of course the almost bald man had asked if something was wrong…. And of course I just shrugged and said "Nothing" and it ended awkwardly. Sigh.

"Well we're here." Armstrong smiled at me, his blue eyes seemed to be glistening in the moonlight, and I felt even more guilty for not trying to be nice to him. The least I could've done was ask him if he was doing okay, then he would've talked and I could've listened. But no, I had to just sulk over my own confusion and sudden sadness.

"Thank you Armstrong, I greatly appreciate you taking the time to walk me to my dorm. I realize I am…. Not the most pleasant person around." I chuckled softly and smiled apologetically. The large man just shook his head and gave me a large grin.

"No, it is no trouble at all Kyoko-san." he answered, "I just don't want anything horrible to happen to you." he added, and with that walked off.

I lazily waved 'bye' and turned to open my door. I lazily dropped my cloak to the ground, closing my door at the same time, and walked over to my sofa to sit down and think for a while longer.

You would think I would've gotten enough thinking time when I was away. But someone can't truly just 'think enough' and stop thinking. There were always things to think about, things to worry about. I hugged my knees tightly and looked out the small window in front of me, looking deep into the dim full moon. Wondering if werewolves were off eating an innocent human, or taunting one sadistically.

We really were easy ones to pick on, aren't we? The ones who easily get beat down, the ones who sensitivity gets the best of them. We are somewhat pathetic. But…

That's what makes us strong.

It was 1:11 am when Alphonse broke down my door. Everything was much of a blur, but I know I will never forget it.

I lay on the couch, curled up and fast asleep. For once, just once, during the day I had felt peaceful, probably because I wasn't awake and I didn't need to think.

Alphonse Elric came, along with a frantic Winry both screaming and yelling too loudly for me to completely comprehend. Only understanding the words; "Ed" "mental" hurry" "help" and "horrible". I remembered sitting up, trying to rub the sleep out of my eyes and asking them to start speaking like normal people, not a bunch of gibberish. Winry had sobbed; "It's horrible! You have to help!" and had run over to tug on my arm. Still, I had no idea about what was going on. I felt like asking where Ed was, but that's when my blood ran cold.

Ed? Had something happened to Ed?

I remembered jolting upwards and running over to Al, who was standing in the doorway and screamed out; "What happened to Edward?" I knew if Al had been in his normal body, he would've been crying along with Winry.

Winry was crying and sobbing double for Alphonse, because he couldn't do it himself.

"He- He… B-big Brother h-he went off a-and… I-in search of Aero and we t-tried to st-stop, really we did! B-but he wou-wouldn't listen! A-alice he found the Aero Alchemist!" Alphonse had stuttered out, shaking and trembling like a newborn pup.

My eyes had widen in horror, and I ran. Ran out the door, ran out the building, ignoring Al's and Winry's pleas to wait. How could I wait knowing Ed was confronting the demented murder?

I did not ask why or how Ed found the Aero Alchemist. I did not ask a further question. I did not start crying and crumple to the ground. No I ran.

I didn't need to know any of these stupid details.

I needed to find Edward.

I realize I was somewhat impulsive, I suppose Ed had rubbed off on me, because I wasn't even sure where the two were. But was I ran wildly in the empty streets, having water being poured onto my head, I remember seeing the alchemical lights in the air, a stunning blue which could've been mistaken for lightning, and a blood red that inked the through the dark skies. I didn't think about it, I just ran after the lights.

The first horrifying scene I remember seeing, is Ed crumpling to the ground and seeing blood gush out of wounds being made by the very air itself. I knew there wasn't much of a chance, how could you possibly fight someone who fought with air? Air was everywhere.

Nevertheless I jumped in front of Edward, transmuted a piece of metal, which had fallen from a house nearby, into a slick sword, and I remember just lunging at him. I didn't hesitate one bit, not for a second, I had inflicted a wound on him, but that's the only one I managed to do.

He pushed me to the ground, wincing I grabbed my ribs wishing I had thought something through. But it was, unfortunately, to late. The man kicked my ribs, tossing me aside like another piece of trash. He didn't recognize me. Looking up, I tried to get the wet hair out of my face, but I was shivering and couldn't move my hands without it shaking uncontrollably.

Never in my life had I felt so weak and helpless.

Then I felt it, my arms legs, and face all being cut and stabbed at as if with a dozen swords and daggers. But I couldn't do anything, I couldn't runaway from air. I cried out in pain, and I managed to look over at Ed who hadn't moved an inch.

I thought it was over, and I felt stupid for not listening, for not being afraid. There was nothing more terrifying then being beaten by something you can not runaway from. There was no hope, Al and Winry, they would get it just as bad as me. To add to it, I did not want Winry and Al to suffer. I loved them and wouldn't allow them to suffer. For a moment, I accepted the pain that was being inflicted on me, I accepted the fact that I might die. I only hoped, that Ed had woken up and run off. I just hoped he would find a way to be safe.

I coughed the little blood I had left and watched as everything began to go blurry, or maybe those were the tears that would refuse to come out.

I saw a flash of red, I heard the man scream, I felt warmth come from the direction the man had been moments before. I struggled to pick up my head and saw none other then my friend Roy Mustang. His expression cold and heartless and I knew then that he was going to murder this man without hesitation. I heard him snap his fingers over and over again, it becoming a rhythm at this point. It was raining, and I knew that his alchemy could last so long, and who knew if the Aero Alchemist would survive or not, so I stood up, ran over to Edward and ran with him in my arms.

The tears mixed in with the blood running down my face, and I knew that sooner or later I would collapse.

I worried over Mustang, hoping he wouldn't stop snapping for even a second, because if he did…. Then that was it.

"Ed! Edward Elric, don't die on me!" I sobbed, screaming over the thunder and lightning. Up to this point, I had never thought about it, how much Ed meant to me. How much I actually cared about him.

How much I loved him.

You don't know what you have until it's gone, is that not the saying? Why though? Why can't we realize earlier? Why are we so blind?

I sobbed loudly again, never had I felt like such a weakling. Like such an idiot. What was I going to fix by crying? Nothing! Yet, I couldn't make myself stop, in the distance I saw a blurry gray image. I immediately. thought it was Alphonse. Whether it was or wasn't I didn't really care. I screamed out for help.

"Help! Help! Help! Please! Ed- Edward is h-hurt! Help him! Please!" I shrieked.

I collapsed then.

When I woke up, everything was numb, and I didn't open my eyes. All the memories flooded my mind all at once, and I chewed on my lip, too scared to open my eyes, scared to find myself dead or worse… Ed dead. I breathed in slowly, it hurt to breathe.

"…. She probably will make it." I heard a voice whisper softly and gently. Like a mother telling her child that her father had died.

"Probably?" shrieked two voices. I recognized them. Roy and Winry.

"What about my brother?" a small voice asked, Alphonse.

"He might not make it… I don't think he'll live."

I lay there, perfectly still and for about a second forgot to breathe. Everyone was shocked into silence.

"I am terribly sorry… he's in a coma, he lost a lot of blood too and fractured some organs." the nurse said. I made a fist, and tried not to cry like a coward again. Here I was, living and breathing and there was Ed, in a long sleep. And who knew if he would live? No, this wasn't fair, life wasn't fair!

After a few more minutes, everyone left. The nurse saying they needed to leave and come back later. They would let them know if we got any better, but the nurse said; "we'll let you know if she gets any better." She refered only to me, as if immediately thinking Edward wouldn't make it. But she was wrong, everyone was wrong. He would make it, they'll see.

I carefully got to my feet, gripping onto the wall for support and made my way to Edward's bed and kneeled down beside him.

"Edward Elric, Fullmetal Alchemist. You are not allowed to die, you have to make it. You're not done in this wicked and terrible world of ours! You still have to get Al's body back, and and…. I love you. Corny right? But it's true Ed, so please. Don't stop fighting. You haven't given up before, so don't give up now! I won't let anyone hurt you ever again!" I whispered, my voice close to cracking. I kissed his cheek and didn't move from my spot. I stayed there and stuck to his side like gum on the bottom of you shoe. Nurses came in and told me to go to bed. I didn't listen.

They didn't understand what this felt like, having your best friend in coma and not being to do anything about it. The very least I could do, is stay by his side.

I was slowly losing my sanity, I thought about ending Ed's life, only to bring him back with human transmutation, that way he would be awake. I was a mess, but I didn't move from my spot. My friends came to visist, they tried to make me feel better, but they just made things a bit worse.

But they meant well.

I know they did.

About three months later, I was completely recovered but Ed was still asleep. I had fallen asleep next to him, my head lying ontop of his stomach, waiting and hoping. People we saying that he wasn't going to make it. Everything, the past three months, had felt like a horrible dream.

But I knew better than thinking it was all a dream.

"Alice..?" I heard a small voice whisper. Great I was hearing voices now. Just splendid. "Alice?" I twitched and slowly opened my eyes and lifted my head, and came face to face with warm golden orbs. My heart jumped into my throat and I almost cried again.

"I'm so glad your okay." Ed whispered, caressing my face softly. I trembled and shut my eyes closed.

"Yo-you moron! What were you thinking!" I screamed, pulling him into a tight embrace and sobbed into his chest. I felt like the world had broken into a million pieces, then magically all the pieces were found in the palm of my hand. "I'm so-sorry Alice. I wanted to find the bastard and protect you." he whispered, his voice sounded so delicate and gentle.

"I don't need protecting! It's been three long months Ed! Everyone thought you were de-dead! I thought so too but I stayed by your side! You had me worried you jerk!" I cried, letting the agony take over. I wanted to let it out, because there was no more reason to be upset anymore.

Everything was going to be okay, just like in those fairy-tail books.

"Alice-chan…. I'm sorry. I know I was being an idiot, sorry. I'll say it over and over again if ya want? But, I love you and didn't want you to get killed…"

"I love you too Ed, don't ever scare me like that again!" I sobbed, crying into his chest and holding him tighter, I was afraid that if I let go, that he would somehow leave me. Edward pat my head and returned the hug. "I wouldn't die so easily!" he snorted.

For the first time in three months, I laughed.


End file.
